Dear Social Media fans and professionals.
Everyday I go into work, I think the same thing as I start up my computer for the day:
NOBODY CARES WHAT YOU ARE DOING.
It’s true. Nobody cares. Nobody should care. Nobody cares about reading this dribble on my blog either. At least I hope not. If you aren’t asking yourself the same questions, you are probably doing social media right.
The reverse mentality, that “everyone cares” what you are doing, is plaguing the field. In recent years, this has come to be known as “Social Media Thirsty.” This is not a phenomenon that only exists in the tech savvy business. It exists in my profession of naval history as well. The idea is to promote your brand, not blast it out to others like a knee jerk reaction. If you do, you are missing the point of social media entirely. ENTIRELY.
Building a brand has never been both easier and harder at the same time. One post can reach millions of people – if you want it to. But how do you get there? There are certain immortal sins I feel social media professionals utilize that totally erase the good work others are doing. I can’t say I am not at fault here, either. I do it all the time. I can’t say I run social media any better than anyone else. In fact, I am probably much worse. I should know better – but it still happens. Social media is a business, and the business model is held together on stilts.
Immortal Sin #1: Facebook Tagging
This annoys the piss out of me. It almost makes me wish there was a limit to characters in Facebook like there is for Twitter. And let’s be honest, if you “tag” other businesses, it goes to a different part of the page that almost nobody save admins really looks at. And let’s be honest, most of those posts people bring TO the page are coming from psycho Fox News people that want to self advertise in the worst ways possible. Self advertise on YOUR page, not others. It’s like name dropping So thirsty.
Immortal Sin #2: Hashtags on Facebook/Meaningless Hashtags is the new Fetch.
Ugh. Stop trying to make this happen. Hashtags are for Twitter. It’s like eating rice with a soup ladle. Sure, you can do it – but it looks out of place and cumbersome, detracting from the main point in the first place. I’m not just talking regular cumbersome, I am talking Seven Mary Three cumbersome. That’s some real talk right there. Don’t be Seven Mary Three, people.
Immortal Sin #3: 7,000 Posts a Day
I think this one is self explanatory. One, maybe two a day. When you couple this sin with any of the others, you enter into the top 3 circle of Dante’s Inferno. Actually, your computer should set itself on fire.
Immortal Sin #4: Spelling Counts
It is ironic that spelling has never been more important than it is now. I have seen WONDERFUL posts ruined by spelling. I do it all the time still. I get it. The anticipation of getting a really good post out there, and you forget to spell check it. But oh no! There are 6 likes already – You don’t want to lose those insights, but you don’t want to get made fun of for misspelling something.
Pro tip – throw your status in text edit or word before you do it. It also keeps an archive of everything you do each day.
Immortal Sin #5: The Humble Brag
This is an immortal sin for LIFE – not just for social media. It’s the fastest way for me to lose respect for you. That or not giving me a hand shake or eye contact when I first meet you. That is the absolute worst. If you have to brag about what you do, or who you are, then you are doing social media wrong. I can’t say I am blameless on this one. Everybody wants to promote their brand. It’s why we do what we do. But there are ways to do it without it looking like an empty, self-congratulatory gesture. I want to TELL YOU that you are awesome – not the other way around. This goes back to the main point – nobody cares what you are doing. Make them care. Give them the thirst. Make them act like they just swallowed a pound of salt from your posts. Make it rain with that Morton Salt.
The whole point is: Make people care. Don’t rely on others to do it. I just hope I have enough “likes” on my Facebook page to make it to Heaven someday.
Delusional Thoughts From Fantasy Island 